Jokes
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Because they all got in a fight and got a black eye lmao.
:crybaby: LMAO What a fucking discrace :nono:
1-people like to play with there money 2-they like to see my money grow 3-When the wife wants to go out and blow money she can stay home LMAO
A coach full of ugly people are in a crash and all die and go to heaven. St Peter says to God what are we going to do. God replies give them all one wish and send them back to earth and they wont...
The body builder takes off his shirt and the blonde says, 'What a Great chest you have!' He tells her, 'That's 100 lbs. Of dynamite, Baby." He takes off his pants and the blonde says,'What...
The Power of a Badge..... DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas , and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher says,...
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it.) If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months,...
The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their Parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end. The next day, the kids came back and, one by one, began to tell...
A man moves into a nudist colony. He receives a letter from his grandmother asking him to send her a current photo of himself in his new location. Too embarrassed to let...
-------------------------- The Fasting and Prayer Conference includes meals. -------------------------- The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for...
A man was lying in bed with his new girlfriend. After having great sex .... She spent the next hour just rubbing his testicles ... Something she just loved to do.
A Blonde's Year in Review January Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight. February Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels........
I went to apply for a job in a Florida lemon grove. The foreman frowned and said, "I have to ask you this: "Have you had any actual experience in picking lemons?"
A pretty little girl named Suzy was standing on the sidewalk in front of her home. Next to her was a basket containing a number tiny creatures; in her hand was a sign announcing FREE KITTENS. ...
On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years." ...
Two guys where walking down the street when they saw two dogs humping. One said, "I wonder how much liquor it would take to get my wife to do it that way". So they made a bet of 10 bucks on...
A frustrated housewife decided her sex life needed spicing up after 20 years of marriage. After her husband went to work she slipped out and went into a lingerie shop and picked up a pair of...
The nun teaching Sunday school was speaking to her class one morning when she asked the question, 'When you die and go to Heaven...which part of your body goes first?' Suzy raised her hand and...
It is near the Christmas break of the school year. The students have turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do. All the children are restless and the teacher decides to have...
At an art exhibition two women were staring at a painting entitled, "Home for Lunch". The painting was of three very naked, and very black men, sitting on a park bench. What was unusual was that...
A white woman walks into a sex shop and approaches the counter. She asks, "How much for the white dildo?" He answers, "$35." "How much for the black one?" "$35 for the black one, $35 for the...
LITTLE GIRL ON A PLANE A stranger was seated next to a little girl on the airplane when the stranger turned to her and said, 'Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a...
God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael, the archangel, found him, resting on the seventh day.. He inquired, "Where have you been?" God smiled deeply and proudly pointed downwards...
Question: What do you get when you mix PMS with GPS?
Some of the artists of the 60's are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers who can remember doing the "Limbo" as if it were yesterday . They include: Bobby...
Drinks That Reflect Personality Before you order a drink in public you should read this. Seven New York City bartenders were asked if they could nail a woman's personality based on what she...
A cabbie picks up a Nun. She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring. He replies, 'I have a question to ask...
My wife sat down on the sofa next to me as I was flipping channels. > She asked, 'What's on TV?' > I said, 'Dust.' > And then the fight started... > > ******************************************...
Proof That Men Have Better Friends... Friendship among Women: A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called...
A chicken farmer went into a local tavern and took a seat at the bar next to a woman patron and orders a glass of champagne. The woman perks up and says, "How about that? I just ordered a glass of...
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